What do you get when two horrendously rich s**tposters get together? Amouranth Musk. An ironic name, considering that Amouranth has a tendency to fart in jars and then sell them for extraordinary prices. I mean, that is certainly a little... shall we say... Musky? Bood-oom... tis? Anyway, Amouranth and Elon Musk are getting together now.
Stop, stop, stop, keep reading: that was a lie, well, a joke, but certainly not true! In fact, it ain't even the purpose of this article. Ah, yes, you have been bamboozled, haven't you? Well, trust me, whilst Amouranth does not technically "love" Elon Musk, she certainly does have a certain affection for the man, considering the couple of things she Tweeted out the other day.
In a way, though, it's not such a bad match. Amouranth clearly admires Elon Musk, and for reasonable reasons (he is, after all, the richest man in the world and she is, after all, filthy rich as well), and Elon is no longer in a long-term relationship. Grimes, our EarlyGame Rocket League Player of the Month for January, and he split a while back. He has a girlfriend, though. So perhaps not?
Amouranth's Admiration is Palpable
After Elon Musk bought out 9% of Twitter, Amouranth jumped straight on said platform with a hot-take everybody saw coming. It's not surprising that she's in support of this, regardless of his relationship status, this is the same lady who bought $2 Million USD in stock of a company famous for alleged sexual harassment and discrimination, saying that she wants to "de-objectify women".
Well, look, whilst we do feel a little uncertain about whether Amouranth, famous for her prolific work on OnlyFans, will be capable of achieving such a goal, her admiration of good ol' Musko is certainly entertaining:
Twitter’s utility as a platform far exceeds its market value. The problem is Twitter’s cashflow and product innovation and monetization efforts have been super disappointing. $FB [Facebook] would buy it if not for anti-trust. Mark [Zuckerberg] literally called it a goldmine. GREAT PICKUP BY @elonmusk
Twitter's utility as a platform far exceeds its market value. The problem is Twitter s cashflow and product innovation and monetization efforts have been super disappointing$FB would buy it if not for anti-trust. Mark literally called it a goldmine— Kaitlyn (@wildkait) April 5, 2022
GREAT PICKUP BY @elonmusk https://t.co/HPLvVDogHt
Through all of that totally uncharacteristic "smart talk" she does manage to say something that is blatantly obvious, but still true: Elon Musk's purchase of Twitter stock is actually a pretty smart business move. Anyway, we're not here to talk about business. We're here to talk about Amouranth Musk, the muskiest Musk of them all. Did any of you guys buy one of those fart jars? So weird...